Splitsville News

For the media sites I frequent, the “big” divorce news this week is that Jon and Kate Gosselin (of “Jon & Kate Plus 8“) are divorcing.  The New York Times has a short story about it here.  The story’s lede comments that “TLC is hoping there is happiness–or at least, good ratings–after divorce.”

While divorce is far from uncommon these days, most folks don’t have a front row seat into a divorce unless it’s their own or unless they’re a family law attorney.  With reality TV giving viewers the sense that they’re “right there” with the folk(s) on the screen, the 10 million or so viewers of Jon & Kate will get a perspective on what it’s like when someone else divorces.  My hope is that the audience will gain an appreciation of how unique parenting plans can be, even if you don’t have Jon & Kate’s unique combination of twins & sextuplets.

Life goes on, certainly.  Newsflash:  There’s life during (and after) divorce.

Although TLC has placed the show on hiatus “so that everyone could adjust to the new circumstances”, the backstory is that the circumstances aren’t that new.  In Kate’s Pennsylvania divorce filing, she states that the couple have been living “separate and apart” for two years.  (Their attorneys clarified that “separate and apart” doesn’t necessarily mean under different roofs…confusing, yes, but in Washington it is possible for a marriage to meet its legal standard of “irretrievably broken” even if the parties are living together.)  Considering the show just ended its fourth season, that means that half the show has taken place during the “separation” period!

Jon & Kate’s announcement–as well as Kate’s divorce filing–may indicate that their marriage is ending, but their divorce process is just beginning.  Jon & Kate’s responsibilities as parents started before the divorce and will end long after it.  For the couple’s sake, for their kid’s sake, and for the audience’s sake, I hope Jon & Kate go through their divorce process in respectful way.  There are a lot of reasons we watch TV and it’s ok if one of those reasons is to be pleasantly surprised.

UPDATE, July 2 2009:  If you want People magazine’s spin on the divorce paperwork, here it is.  Before you get too excited, here’s the disclaimer:  “Beware of reading too much in to the perfectly standard filings that have appeared so far, legal experts tell PEOPLE. About the only thing that is clear is that the couple, who married in 1999 and have eight kids, are opting for a no-fault divorce – the kind that lawyers like to call ‘divorce with dignity’.” So far, “Jon and Kate have just begun the divorce process…and are taking the high road”.  Good work, Jon & Kate!

If you want to go peeking into someone else’s filings (which are technically public record), the website TMZ.com the divorce papers that Kate Gosselin filed here.